Queer-affirming therapy
Specialized in working with LGBTQ+ clients primarily in St. Louis and Lisbon
Offering in-person sessions in Lisbon and online therapy across Missouri, Portugal, and internationally.
A nervous system, IFS/parts-informed approach.
Gender and sexual orientation exploration
You might be here because you feel stuck in an impossible situation.
On some level, you know something about yourself that hasn’t had much room to exist. At the same time, being fully honest may feel like it could cost you your relationship, your family, or the life you’ve worked hard to build. You may feel caught between wanting to be more yourself and wanting not to lose the people who matter most to you, or worrying about safety in ways that feel very real.
Often, people come to therapy in this place carrying anxiety, depression, or a sense of quiet despair that has been building for years. The problem isn’t just identity. It’s the exhaustion of holding everything together, of staying hidden in ways that once felt necessary, and of not knowing what kind of honesty is even possible right now.
You don’t have to know what comes next to start therapy. You don’t have to be ready to make decisions, name an identity, or move quickly toward change. Sometimes the first step is simply having a place where you don’t have to hide, where the pace is slow enough to think, feel, and notice what’s actually true for you.
I work with queer adults, including lesbian, gay, bisexual, pansexual, trans, and gender-expansive clients.
Processing early and ongoing homophobic and transphobic trauma
For some people, part of what brings them to therapy is that earlier experiences are being activated again in the present.
They may have already done a lot of work around coming out and self-acceptance. They may be living openly, supported by the people closest to them, and no longer questioning their identity. And still, things happen in the world that stir up younger, bullied, or closeted parts all over again.
For many queer and trans clients, early experiences of homophobia or transphobia within family, religion, or culture shaped how safety, connection, and self-expression were learned. Even when those dynamics are no longer present in a person’s closest relationships, it makes complete sense that the nervous system may stay alert, especially in uncertain social and political climates.
This can show up as anxiety, shame, or a sense of being on guard, not because something is wrong, but because parts are doing their best to protect. In therapy, we work gently with these layers, helping parts differentiate between when heightened vigilance is still necessary and when more ease might be possible, without forcing either.
How queer-affirming therapy can unfold over time
Given all of this, therapy over time can become a place where the nervous system has a bit more room to settle.
Sometimes people come to therapy knowing exactly what they want and what their next steps are. Other times, the process is not fast or linear. We pay attention to what happens inside when anxiety spikes, when mood drops, or when certain topics suddenly feel harder to touch. Often, those reactions make sense when understood as protective responses shaped by both past experiences and present realities.
Progress here sometimes looks like decisive actions, but sometimes more like increased self-trust. Over time, clients may notice that they can tolerate uncertainty a bit better, listen more closely to themselves, and respond with more compassion rather than impulsivity or self-criticism.
Sometimes therapy supports people in making changes. Other times, it supports people in living more honestly within real constraints, while staying connected to the people and responsibilities they care about. Both are meaningful forms of movement.
Finding a safe space to open up and learn what’s inside can be an empowering way to move forward.
How I am in this work
Everyone’s circumstances and history are different. I try to meet people where they actually are, rather than where they think they should be. For some people, that means developing more compassion and acceptance for where they are and what their current circumstances allow. For others, it means gently working through fears and protective responses so those fears no longer get to decide what is possible in parts of their life that matter to them.
With queer and trans clients who are exploring or questioning their identity, this often looks like staying closely attuned to what is shifting internally. Fluidity is common, so when something feels different than it did before, we can slow down and notice it together. That might include changes in how you relate to your body or circumstances, shifts in comfort or discomfort, or a growing sense that something wants attention without yet knowing what it is.
For clients exploring gender, I work in a way many people experience as gender-affirming, without assuming direction, outcome, or timeline. This work is not about telling you who you are, what you should do next, or how quickly things should change. Therapy is a space where uncertainty, protection, and conflicting needs are welcomed. Clarity is allowed to develop at a pace that respects your nervous system and your life. For some people, there is a sense of "just knowing" from an early age. For others, clarity emerges over time, and part of my role is helping you find steadiness and peace with uncertainty as it unfolds.
I tend to work at a pace that respects both curiosity and protection. Many people come in with parts that are cautious for good reason. Therapy becomes a place where those parts are understood rather than pushed aside, while also making room for choice, agency, and movement when fear has started to limit something important.
I am a Licensed Professional Counselor and psychotherapist in Missouri, and I offer LGBTQ-affirming therapy that centers safety, pacing, and respect for each person’s lived experience. I work with queer and LGBTQ+ adults in St. Louis and throughout Missouri.
If you are living outside the U.S., including in Portugal, you can read more about how this work is offered on my International Clients page.
FAQs
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No. Many people come to therapy feeling uncertain, conflicted, or not ready to name things clearly. Therapy can be a place to explore what feels true at your own pace, without pressure to arrive at an identity or make any decisions unless that is what your system is ready for. Learn more.
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No. Some clients are exploring identity, while others are already out and established and want a therapist who understands queer and LGBTQ+ culture without needing explanation. Therapy often focuses on anxiety, relationships, trauma, or life stress, with identity held as context rather than the problem. Learn more.
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Those concerns are real, and they make sense. Therapy can be a place to talk openly about safety, visibility, and risk, and to work with the parts of you that stay alert for good reason. We move carefully, with attention to what is possible and safe in your specific life. Learn more.
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Yes. I am experienced in working with religious trauma. Many clients carry the impact of early experiences of homophobia or transphobia within family, religion, or culture. Even when circumstances have changed, those experiences can continue to affect a person. This is something we can work with at your pace. Learn more.
Closing
If any part of this feels familiar, you don’t need to have it all figured out before reaching out.
People come to therapy at many different points. Some are questioning or exploring. Some are carrying old experiences that have been stirred up again by what’s happening now. Others simply want a place where they can work on anxiety, relationships, or life stress without having to translate or explain who they are.
We can start wherever you are. Therapy doesn’t require certainty, clarity, or a plan. It can begin with slowing down, paying attention to what feels most present, and creating enough safety to listen more closely to yourself.
If you’re curious about working together, you’re welcome to reach out to schedule a consultation.
If you are living outside the U.S., including in Portugal, you can read more about how this work is offered on my International Clients page.